Jared Rea

After searching for what feels like an eternity, I finally saw The Machine Girl last night. Not like it’s rare or anything, but I’ve had just about the hardest luck in tracking it down. I randomly stumbled upon it while strolling past some DVDs at Amoeba, after having just searched for it where it should have been. I consider the great force of luck to be balanced.

So did it live up to the hype? Hell yes it did. Little thoughts and screencaps after the break.

The easiest way to describe The Machine Girl is to call it a popcorn flick, which it totally would be if I thought most people could hold down food while watching. Everything in this movie is over-the-top cheese, but there are some serious gross-out moments. Even the incredibly goofy special effects can’t quite spoil the sight of people eating their own fingers and the tons and tons of gore flying all about the place. In short, it is awesome beyond belief.

Before I picked it up, I was warned by someone on GAF (in an Oneechanbara thread no less) that it was “shit,” largely due to the amount of story it tries to push on the audience. I mean, this is a movie about a girl with a machine gun for an arm shooting people in the face. How much story do you really need? Well, lots, apparently. For such a simple revenge flick (”My name is Ami. You killed my brother. Prepare to die.”) The Machine Girl has a Wizard of Oz complex where it’s not sure whether it lacks a brain or a heart, constantly struggling with whether or not it’s total cornball goodness or a dramatic blood opera. By the time the film is over, chances are you won’t remember the name of these characters anyway, but at least in its trying we do get one of the most hilarious arm wrestling scenes since Predator, which wouldn’t have been half as funny had it not been trying to convince you to care about them.

Even though I found myself asking aloud when we were going to get to the fireworks factory, the trip ultimately pays off. For all its violence and cheesy plot, The Machine Girl is an adorable flick, if you can stomach all the carnage that is.