Jared Rea

Like a lot of folks out there, I can’t wait to get my hands on Fable II. Unfortunately, Pub Games is a bitter first taste as you can tell from my review at The Escapist.

Pub Games is a great experiment for Microsoft but it doesn’t seem to do anyone any favors. The games themselves don’t hold enough weight to interest those not already interested in Fable II and the pay outs aren’t big enough or frequent enough to be useful for those who are. Unless of course you’re totally cheating.

Still, this hasn’t stopped me from pre-ordering a Limited Edition, even when I originally opted for a standard copy. The power of the Chief compelled me.

This week’s issue of The Escapist is up and it’s dedicated to Korean gaming. Having played just about every MMORPG on the market and tons of Pump it Up in my time, naturally, this was a perfect fit. So I went to San Francisco and checked out Aion: Tower of Eternity from NC Soft.

The current crop of Korean-developed MMORPG titles like Dream of Mirror Online, FlyFF and Rappelz are living relics of a time long forgotten. This is the climate facing Aion:The Tower of Eternity, the latest from the original Korean MMOG creators at NCsoft. Not only are they looking to wash away the sins of Korean MMOG hell with this new game, but their own distorted image as well.

If you didn’t catch the joke on the title, you should probably educate yourself on old Korean pride pop anthems. I felt it was totally appropriate.

I swore that I’d never change my Marty O’Donnell gamerpic, but after both yesterday’s video and a rousing speech by Senator Kennedy, I felt inspired to stand a bit taller. May the brilliance of his mullet shine upon those whose Xbox’s are deemed noble. Good night, sweet prince. And flights of angels sing thee to thy rest.

The avatar swap was made as a show of support for Microsoft and MTV’s recent Rock the Vote collaboration (even if I still prefer the wonderfully ludicrous “Vote or Die”) which will not only provide streaming election coverage to Xbox 360 owners but more importantly, allow them to register to vote. Not that I enjoy the idea of your average Xbox Live citizen being enabled with the power of the vote, but I do appreciate the advocacy.

Whether these new voters go on to cast their ballot for Barack Obama, John McCain, or hell, even Bob Barr, I can only hope that this somewhat risky team-up inspires the youth of Xbox Live take a serious look at the issues and realize just how important this election is. I guess I have a somewhat selfish reason for wanting this, as I recall standing outside the voting booth in 2004, realizing that I was the only person under the age of 30 at my station. My generation simply can not afford to remain ignorant to the ever changing world around them.

This is about as far as a random joke on Twitter should probably go.

Much like how Rudy Giuliani became known for nothing more than a noun, a verb and 9/11 (By the way, I’m pumped for Biden), Senator John McCain has put himself in a position where he stands for little more than his time as a prisoner of war during Vietnam. When the Obama campaign nailed him for forgetting how many houses he owns, John McCain cried POW. When the fact that McCain was not in a “cone of silence” during the Saddleback forum came to light, McCain responded with POW. Even when offering up his wife in a wet t-shirt contest, the answer was POW. And these were just a few of the instances that a quick google search turned up. The google search necessary only because I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve heard this excuse in the past week alone.

John McCain uses his prisoner of war status as both sword and shield. It’s the entirety of his foreign policy experience and ultimate defense against legitimate questions and concerns rolled into a single onomatopoeia.

I wouldn’t have such a problem with this had he utilized his tragic experience in some sort of relevant way. For example, as an advocate for better care and rehabilitation for our troops coming back from the Middle East with post traumatic stress disorder and other conditions, as I’m sure he knows exactly what that feels like. Or how about shining a light on not only the veterans of our current wars, but those of past wars who had no home to come back to? I’d gladly accept his lame, “I lived in one house for five and a half years,” joke were it in that context. Instead, his experience has become just that: a punchline.

Typically, these sorts of opinion pieces are accompanied by a disclaimer. Something like, “John McCain is a national hero and deserves respect for his time as a prisoner of war, but!” The “but,” this time being that I don’t care for that disclaimer. Until John McCain shows some respect for not only himself but his fellow veterans by not trivializing something so horrible, I don’t feel the need to respect it either.

Now I’ve done it. I’ve kicked off my on-going series of Madden entries with my signature line of trash talk. All that’s left now is, you know, actual discussion. Yes, it’s another year good ol’ EA Sports football and I’m hoping that this year will be better than the last. I don’t mean the game itself. This years game is great! I’m talking about my performance. Despite playing some form of Madden or NCAA Football for nearly a decade straight, I still suck quite a bit. I throw more interceptions per game than John Madden downs hoagies per hour. It’s a sad sight.

Not helping matters is my choice of team: the Oakland Raiders. They’re tied for second worst team in the league this year with a pitiful score of 71, so once again it’ll be an uphill battle. Fortunately, it seems impossible to actually draw penalties this year, sparing myself at least one form of self defeat with my favorite team.

First up in my quest to be a Super Bowl champion was a rivalry game against the Denver Broncos. Welcome to the black hole, bitches.

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There are two comments that must always be made when discussing Arc System Works’ (Guilty Gear) upcoming HD-2D fighter, BlazBlue: Calamity Trigger. The first being, “My arcade will never get it / There are no more arcades,” which is immediately followed by, “I’ll just wait for the console port.” I have some bad news. BlazBlue most likely won’t be hitting consoles until late 2009. The good news, however, is that US publisher Aksys Games wants to help you play it now.

A representative for the publisher has been posting on Shoryuken, asking that we send them the information they need to try and get BlazBlue at an arcade near you.

I do feel some of you may not have an arcade near you, however, here’s where you guys step up and help the scene. If you have a arcade near you and you know they may not know about BlazeBlue, please let me know by sending me a PM, emailing me, send a bird out with a note, whatever it takes and I’ll personally call that arcade and I’ll work it out with them on getting a blazblue board or cabinet. This is our chance folks, to try to broaden this release beyond just the usual arcades. Granted, I can’t promise all arcades will take them, but if we don’t try, we’ll never know, right?

And what if you don’t have an arcade in your area? If there’s a movie theatre or some other location with a decent collection in your area, you could always try and get in touch with them via the contact information found on the machine themselves and send that Aksys’ way.

So if you want to try and help get this amazing fighter in as many arcades as possible, shoot them a line. Their email address is support@aksysgames.com. Try to include as much information as possible, including the address, telephone number and appropriate people to contact for arcade sales.

In a random fit of retro craving (I was in the mood for some good chiptune) I stumbled upon this Spelunker melody. The progression of which should sound very familiar to those who have ever attempted the deep dive.

I’ve never quite settled on whether I thought Spelunker was a bad game or not. Looking back, it could have been considered a fairly revolutionary title with its seamlessly connected levels and large variety of different traps and puzzle elements. It was also developed by some kind of otherworldly fiend whose mere existence in this plane depended on the tears of children of which it fed.

And yet, it managed to be come an utterly charming piece of 8-bit nostalgia. It’s hard to deny a poor cave dweller who drops dead if he falls more than 2 pixels at a time.

The Escapist has published my first review for them this week (Thanks Susan!) and it’s for Geometry Wars: Retro Evolved 2.

Released in 2005, the original Geometry Wars: Retro Evolved could be considered a proficiency test in game playing skills, challenging players with the very essence of high-end gaming. At its core, Geometry Wars is a manic, dual-stick shooter that favors the quick and the coordinated, making short work of those with low response mechanisms. It also confronts players with their ability to overcome an epileptic fit (as cautioned in game manuals everywhere), bombarding them with more colors than a Norwegian laser rave.

It’s sort of a no-brainer, right? It was nigh impossible to find anything to complain about with the original Geometry Wars and now, Bizarre Creations has essentially perfected their beast. It concerns me to hear Stephen Cakebread talk about how he has “enough game ideas to do ‘Geometry Wars’ for probably about 10 games,” as I don’t think I want this ten more times, but if they can somehow manage to keep it fresh while still keeping it simple, I’d bite at least one more time.

PS: How do you like the new look? There are still a few tweaks to make here and there, but this is it for the most part.